So because I’m Latina I started this thing in my office called Taco Thursday.

Everyone brought something different and we’d all get together for a long lunch. It was great. The only other person who showed up every week was one guy, we’ll call him E. Well E got really sick with ulcers so he couldn’t handle certain kinds of food anymore, and Taco Thursdays kind of died.

Tomorrow is my last Thursday in the office and everyone has planned a super sweet farewell Taco Thursday lunch. nomnomnomnom

Seven.

One is sitting on my computer screen right now. They’re fruit flies, and I did just eat a banana, but they were here before I even got to my desk. WHYYYYYYYYY.

I totally already killed one.

They’re harassing me.

all I have inside me on a hungover Monday.

4:16PM the final stretchhhhhh

is making my whole hungover Monday life so much worse. plzdie

I love it when people say it.

1) I don’t care what the weather looks like. I can’t go outside for over 8 hours. I hate you.

2) No, you may NOT use my trashcan for your smelly ass lunch remnants.

3) No, I don’t know where room BQ2351299 is. Tell me who you’re looking for.

4) Buildings are designed a specific way. Use your brain. If you keep walking, I promise you’ll be able to find a bathroom.

5) I may pencilstab the next person who needs me to get up and show them where something is.

6) Say thank you if I help you. Or I will hate you forever.

7) If I have to listen to you cough nonstop for the third day in a row tomorrow, I may need to find a reason to send you home for the rest of the week.

8) Do not, under any circumstances, come up to me from behind. Ever.

9) Stop hovering.

10) Let me tumblr in peace. I am capable of multitasking.